Chris Cooper
Anxiety As A Catalyst, Liberation From Rejection, & Writing On Weed
“At this point, I am so enured with rejection. For a while, rejection made me bitter, now it makes me better. When I get rejection letters now I think, “Good, fuck you, I’m going to get this published.” - Chris Cooper
Listen on Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Overcast | Google Play | Stitcher | YouTube
Full Episode On YouTube
Intro
On this episode of Auxoro, Zach speaks with short story author Chris Cooper. Chris has received acclaim for his irreverence in his stories. During their discussion, they pick apart everything from the philosophy of meaninglessness to the metaphysics of anxiety. Chris offers advice to the depressed young nihilist and the writer who must be true to himself.
Key Takeaways
How Chris Initially Got Into Fitness
He stopped playing football and got into powerlifting very early on.
(9:05) “I set a record for bench presses: I was like 150 pounds and I put up like 290.” - Chris.
He won his first Strongman in college.
(11:30) “If I wasn’t the strong man or the jacked guy, I didn’t know who I was.” - Chris.
(13:45) “Every one of the guys you idolize is on juice.” - Chris.
Anxiety as Catalyzing Agent
Most people don’t try to uncover problems in the fit of panic.
(15:13) “You could have a thousand panic attacks, and every one is like ‘this is it, I’m gonna die!’” - Chris.
(17:18) “Your mind can be the protagonist or the antagonist of your life.” - Chris.
In the middle of a panic attack, the first thing Chris does is check his heart rate. He encourages the listener to just focus on their breathing.
Most panic attacks are triggered by something.
(21:00) “You have to take the power back from your anxiety.” - Chris.
If you sit with yourself long enough, your body will reveal sources of anxiety.
A History of Irreverence and Philosophy
Chris’s overactive imagination frequently got him in trouble.
He shares a story about being suspended from school at eight years old because he was writing a violent comic book.
(28:40) “I always identified with the villain in comic books.” - Chris.
(31:30) “I was lashing out at people; I would just go to parties and start fighting people.” - Chris.
Stoicism as a kind of deterrent to violence of the mind.
Every psychiatrist has basically been unhelpful for Chris.
It was after reading Kierkegaard that Chris began to make sense of his anxieties.
He quotes Kierkegaard: “Anxiety is the dizziness of freedom.”
His reading of Camus helped him to understand nihilism and absurdism.
(39:00) “Life, while it has no inherent meaning, you can rebel against that.” - Chris.
Liberating Yourself from the Fear of Death and Rejection
The idea that there is no light at the end of the tunnel should motivate us to do our best work now.
(43:20) “I found my life becoming more meaningful once I started to drift from Catholicism.” - Zach.
The beauty of a short life is that we have the ability to take in everything we’re feeling.
Writing to Help Understand Yourself
Chris started writing and started to process his own emotions.
His first book was called Fix It
To sell a book, you have to first acquire a representative in the form of an agent.
(51:40) “People are so consumed with finding themselves when they really just need to understand themselves.”- Chris.
(55:00) “In a lot of ways a happy ending is actually uninspiring.” - Zach.
Unfortunately, the publishing industry is oversaturated now.
Chris’s Stories, “Calvin Klein,” “Finn Almost Buys a Goldfish,” and
“The Swim”
He first wanted to write a story that outlines children.
(1:01:40) “We have to look at life like it’s fucking absurd.” - Chris.
Rejection made Chris bitter, but now it’s making him better.
A 1984-esque story that deals with the racism of today.
(1:05:10) “There is no formula for good writing: it’s all about bias. You’ve got to just get it out there and hope someone identifies with me.” - Chris.
(1:07:20) “This is the best representation of a panic attack that I’ve ever read.” - Zach.
(1:10:00) “How can I write a story where you’re confused? I wanted to juxtapose these simplistic ideas in abstract terms: the mundane and the profound.” - Chris.
His stories also try to embody what anxiety really feels like.
He wants to explore darkness in a way that people suffering through trauma can really relate to.
(1:18:45) “I’m cognizant that my worst days are ahead of me.” - Chris.
The Purity of Water
While writing “The Swim,” he was dealing with the death of his grandmother and great depression.
A near-death experience while driving caused him to hydroplane off the road.
(1:24:00) “The water is life...in the story, he’s trapped against the current.” - Chris.
From “The Swim”: “Is there anything more depressing than knowing you’re worth more dead than alive?”
Chris attempted to capture the dichotomy of wanting to die and realizing that you really don’t want to die.
Can You Actually Write Drunk?
Hemingway said to write drunk, edit sober...so maybe to some degree.
Chris suggests at least being lucid if you want your writing to be any good.
(1:28:30) “It’s like a microcosm for life...we want to silent the voice that’s telling us that we’re not worth it.” - Chris.
Tim Ferriss’s Five Bullet Fridays.
Advice to the Young Writer
Don’t become a writer. (Just kidding.)
(1:31:15) “You’re not special. Every story you’ve written has been written before.” - Chris.
Once you realize this, you won’t take rejection so personal.
It’s not until you start embracing who you are that you can start to encounter the right person.
(1:35:30) “If you get rejected and you’re showing who you really are, what’s worse than that?” - Chris.
At the end of the day, it’s information that we can use.
If this next book doesn’t get picked up, Chris is okay with that.
(1:41:20) “At the end of the day, you have to write for yourself. Otherwise you will always feel like a fraud.” - Chris.
Follow Chris on IG: @coopd88.
Read Chris’s short stories, Calvin Klein , Finn Almost Buys a Goldfish, Descent, and The Swim
Follow Auxoro at auxoro.com.