Written by Zach Grossfeld

I’m against lying almost always, not only because it’s immoral, but because telling the truth is more useful.

To be clear, I lie. This article applies as much, or even more to myself as it does to others. I’ve always known that lying is wrong, but recently my lies have begun to bother me more than usual. Something small like “Those pants look great!” will stay in my thoughts for days.

The truth is a filter. When I tell someone the truth, I am painting a clearer picture of myself, the weirdness, badness, and all.

That person then takes the truth and files it under their perception of me, Zach Grossfeld.

People see me.

Based on what I say, people avoid me, offer me a job, confide in me, break up with me, marry me, sleep with me, the list never ends. If what I say is untrue, I build a false reality.

They don't see me, they see the lie.

One lie starts a chain reaction that magnifies the falsehood. Lying is like making small cracks in a mirror. Not only do the lies distort reality when you look in the mirror, but when everyone else does too.

For example, let’s say that your friend orders you a drink that you don’t like: a vodka soda. When he hands you the drink, you say “Thanks, I love vodka sodas!” Now your friend will order you a vodka soda every time you walk into a bar. So will your other friends who see you drinking vodka sodas. And you can’t tell your other friends that you hate vodka sodas because what if the original friend finds out? He’ll know that you’re a liar. Your new reality is not “guy who loves vodka sodas.”

It’s a tiny crack.

Nothing wrong with vodka sodas, but it’s now also a crack that everyone else sees when they look in your mirror.

Now, let’s take a more serious example.

Your friend says to you, “Hey, are you good at Excel?” You tell him yes even though you haven’t opened Microsoft Excel since junior year of college. Everyone knows how to use excel, I can’t say no. Three months later, you go on a job interview and the boss asks you if you know how to use Excel. You’ve already lied about it a few times since then, what’s the big deal? You’ve looked in the cracked mirror so many times you’ve forgotten reality, so you say, “Yes, I’m good at excel.”

Then, the boss sends you an Excel test, you pay a friend to do it, then after the next round interview, the boss offers you a job. You walk into the office on Monday to get paid for a task you have no idea how to complete.

The crack deepens.

Lying is unuseful and a waste of time.

The fewer cracks in the mirror, the better people can judge you.

When people leave you, spend time with you, work with you, kiss you, and fire you based on the truth, it’s because they see you. They aren't making decisions based on a reality that you made up.

One lie sets the wheel in motion.

Not lying is also in your long term best interest. When people can’t see you, they may bother you with things, people, and experiences, you have no interest in. You may even feel compelled to join these activities to conceal the lie.

The truth saves time, the most important asset we have.

Take the shortest route to the truth. Slowing down the truth is also a form of deception. Anything you say to distort or slow down someone’s ability to judge you, another, or a situation is a lie.

Every time you tell a lie, you rob someone of the opportunity to know the truth and still accept you.

Some will leave, but you’ll know that the ones who stay are doing so with a clear picture of you in mind.

Even the smallest lie is a trap.

It may convince others to be part of your life in ways that they shouldn’t.

Filter out the bullshit with the best bullshit filter in town: the truth.

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